{"id":3343,"date":"2011-01-10T15:43:28","date_gmt":"2011-01-10T23:43:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/?p=3343"},"modified":"2011-01-10T15:43:28","modified_gmt":"2011-01-10T23:43:28","slug":"suicidal-seagull","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/2011\/01\/10\/suicidal-seagull\/","title":{"rendered":"Suicidal Seagull"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p>Dear Diary:<\/p>\n<p>On a balmy fall night, my wife and I saw a seagull strutting up Fifth Avenue.<\/p>\n<p>Suddenly, the bird darted across the street into the rush-hour traffic. I cringed as it avoided the first car, then got clobbered by the second one. Like a punch-drunk fighter, the gull got up and limped toward the fine shops on Madison Avenue.<\/p>\n<p>Unable to watch a drama that was destined to end badly, I raced toward the kamikaze bird. Shaken, it tried to fly away, but a broken wing kept it earthbound. As I picked it up, it stared defiantly and bit me.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2011\/01\/10\/nyregion\/10diary.html\" target=\"_blank\"><i>Read the rest at the New York Times feature, &#8220;Metropolitan Diary&#8221;<\/i><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Diary: On a balmy fall night, my wife and I saw a seagull strutting up Fifth Avenue. Suddenly, the bird darted across the street into the rush-hour traffic. I cringed as it avoided the first car, then got clobbered by the second one. Like a punch-drunk fighter, the gull got up and limped toward [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[10],"tags":[777,825,835,1062],"class_list":["post-3343","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nature-2","tag-metropolitan-diary","tag-nature","tag-new-york-city","tag-seagull"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4OKzG-RV","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3343","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3343"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3343\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3343"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3343"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/caitlinburke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3343"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}